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Weddings on the Mind

Putting mental health first in the wedding industry

By modefor, Sep 12 2020 02:57PM

According to research, one of the most stressful things you can do in your life is get married. Although weddings are a lovely and special occasion, the planning and time it can take to create this perfect day can put huge strain on your mental health.


It is also the same for those working within the wedding industry. All wedding suppliers want to make sure everything is absolutely perfect for the wedding couple on their special day, so although this is their passion and what they excel at, it can also impact on their mental health.

Especially at the moment.


With COVID-19 restrictions causing thousands and thousands of changes within the wedding industry (and many more to come!), although the wedding couple suffer the most, so do wedding suppliers.


For suppliers who are self-employed this not just affects their business, it affects their livelihood. If they don’t earn money, food doesn’t go on the table and bills don’t get paid - it’s that simple.


That’s why we're so keen on helping to promote the ‘postpone don’t cancel’ movement throughout the wedding industry. Postponing your wedding day to another date in the future can help keep wedding suppliers in business, meaning your wedding day can still happen, as you wanted, with them at a later date.


Here at Mode For..., we are hosting a completely free mental health awareness session on Monday 21st September at 4pm, for anyone in the wedding industry. This session will help you become more mental health aware and help you to identify early signs and symptoms of mental ill health of not only yourself, but also your clients and colleagues. There will also be an open and honest Q&A with weddings and event industry professional, Mode For… Director and mental health advocate and trainer for Mental Health First Aid England, Tabby Kerwin.


It’s all completely free!


To sign up, click here: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/mental-health-awareness-in-the-wedding-industry-tickets-117503390805


We all have mental health, so let’s talk about it!


Love Keri x




By modefor, Aug 19 2020 09:16AM

The following blog has been written by one of our amazing Mode for... creative team, Keri Graham.


Keri is a wedding planner, musician and book lover and has been right at the heart of the wedding industry during the COVID-19 pandemic.


But, even amongst the chaos, she has found some positives which she shares with you here...


2020 has been one heck of a year for the wedding industry, with only around 3 months of usual wedding trading allowed to take place.


But the good news is, you can still get married!


Now it seems we are (hopefully!) over the worst, current restrictions are that you can have up to 30 people attend a wedding ceremony. These numbers include the person conducting your ceremony and a photographer, so you can invite up to 25 of your nearest and dearest to join you.


I’m a Wedding Coordinator and personally, I love small, intimate weddings! There is so much more available time for you during the day to spend with your loved ones - although at a safe social distance at the moment!


So, why not make the most of a bad situation? At the end of the day, you’re still getting married and saying those important vows to each other, and that is the most important part of any wedding! Yes, you may not have everyone you wanted present, but you could always have a bigger ‘do’ to celebrate at a later date and invite all those that you weren’t able to.

Here’s a few little tips you can do to help make the most of your wedding at this time;


Personalised face masks

Instead of giving your guests traditional wedding favours, perhaps supply your guests with personalised face masks. They’re a great keepsake from your special day and they’ll be sure to use them! In England, face masks during wedding ceremonies have to be worn by guests, so you could have these waiting on their designated seats as they enter the ceremony room.


Video call loved ones

If there really is someone special that couldn’t make the day, arrange to video call the ceremony to them. We have some amazing technology with FaceTime & Zoom/Skype now, so this is an easy and free thing to arrange.


Get married later..….which means you get a lie in!

As there won’t be a reception or big group photographs to take, think about moving your ceremony to later in the day. This will give you time for those extra zzz’s and also, gives you plenty of time to get ready. This can really help calm and relax you on your wedding day, as you won’t have the hustle and bustle of a busy room full of people getting ready with you.


Enjoy a larger celebration at a later date

With the extra money you will be saving from having an intimate wedding, why not put this towards a bigger party to celebrate when you are able to. You can invite all the people you weren’t able to have attend the ceremony and can bring along your photo album for everyone to have a nosey at! This really does extend your wedding celebrations and gives you something to look forward to. But if that’s not your thing…..why not put the extra money towards an amazing honeymoon to start off your married lives!


Of course, for some couples, a smaller day is just not for them and that’s okay. Just please remember to postpone your day, not cancel, to help all the lovely suppliers in the wedding industry.


Keep up to date over on our Instragam @weddingsonthemind for more hints and tips to make sure you enjoy your wedding day stress free, whatever your guest numbers!


Love

Keri x



By modefor, Oct 24 2019 08:18AM

A quick look at some areas of your wedding you need to be honest with from Pinterest to Budgets and Family...


One of the most valuable things we can be is honest but, being honest with ourselves is tricky and this is especially true when it comes to our own wedding.


Therefore, it’s time to get honest, realistic and believe in your own integrity when it comes to planning your wedding.


Let me break it down a little into three key areas, in no particular order (and btw… there are plenty more things you can get honest about, not just these! Don’t even start me on children at weddings and traditions such as cake cutting and first dances!).


Pinterest

Firstly, whilst I love Pinterest for inspiration and general nosiness, get off it when making your final planning decisions for your wedding. Get your own wedding and stop stealing someone else’s! Be honest with yourself and ask yourself what YOU and YOUR partner really want. Don’t just copy someone else’s wedding or ideas that some professionals put together for a styled shoot. These images are there to be inspiration for you and not for you to carbon copy. So, close your eyes, imagine your big day… what does it look like? Honestly? Now create this vision.


Budget

Yep, the big ‘taboo’ that you need to be really honest about because quite simply, starting married life in debt purely from a party you were paying for where everyone else ate and drank sucks! So, be realistic and honest. Pick your budget truthfully and stick to it. You can have the most amazing wedding on a small budget. These big fancy expensive weddings do not make you any happier in married life than an elopement and quiet dinner with just the two of you.


Small budget does not mean missing out. It’s an opportunity to get wise and savvy financially and produce a wedding which is the truest reflection of you both as a couple with the people you love most around you.


Which brings me on to my third point…


Family

Get really brutally honest here. If you don’t like them, don’t see them and have nothing to do with them, why would you invite them? Especially if it was at the detriment of a friend who has shared so much with you or quite simply just makes you laugh and you want them at your party? Being related does not give people the right to expect an invitation to your wedding.


Now, I’m not suggesting a lack of sensitivity and being mean in not inviting family members but remember this is your wedding and you get to choose who you share it with. You could always do a separate informal family party to invite them all if you have heaps of family but actually want some friends at your wedding.


You must be honest to yourselves and do exactly what you feel comfortable with. Don’t think you are at the mercy of any historic traditions and protocols; you’re not. This is about the two of you and by the way, just because someone contributes to funding your wedding does not give them the right to dictate your guest list.


Be calm, compromise but be honest about your feelings and be empowered to take control of your wedding.


Want a chat about how you can keep calm, keep anxiety at bay and be honest with yourself to have a wedding that truly reflects you? Then drop me an email at [email protected]


Much Love

Tabby xxx



Pic by Adam Wilkinson Photography
Pic by Adam Wilkinson Photography

By modefor, Jun 12 2019 08:58AM

We’ve all heard the term ‘Bridezilla.’


I’m so thankful that I’ve always had the best clients and never had any ‘Bridezillas.’


But I want to introduce you to another player in the wedding planning and wedding day scenario.

The ‘Mumzilla.’


One of the greatest causes of stress for couples when planning a wedding is a ‘Mumzilla,’ as this is a creature no-one will or can say ‘No’ too!


But I do say a massive ‘NO’ to the Mumzilla.


When it comes to planning a wedding, there is a role for everyone to play, even if that’s just a supporting role, but the most important thing to remember is this wedding only belongs to two people; the couple getting married.


Unfortunately, whilst sometimes it does come from a place of love and wanting to help, some Mums overstep the mark; running the show, making the decisions, controlling the guest list, deciding on the décor, choosing the canapés and even picking the dress. None of these responsibilities fall on a ‘mum’ unless it has been specifically requested or for a particular reason that the couple can’t do it themselves.


Now, I’ve actually met a few Mumzillas and I am not scared of them and have put them back in their cages, but often I see Mums swooping in and controlling the whole shebang when the couple would love nothing more than a ‘do’ in the back garden with all their mates and beer pong, but what they got was a full stately manor with white doves.


The bottom line is, if you’re a Mum, rein it in. Check in with yourself that you're not being a little OTT. This is NOT your wedding. Be supportive, be exactly what your offspring need you to be, but don’t take over the show and you certainly don’t get to dictate what and how things are done or who comes to celebrate, even if you are footing the bill. Of course, you get to make requests and have ideas and be a part of the process if that’s right, but even if you’re financially responsible, this payment does not give you the authority to hijack the whole day.


Let the couple have their day.


Help your daughter be the calm bride or son be the calm groom. Help, love and support, please do not add to the stress, strain and already present pressure that comes with planning a wedding.


Got a Mumzilla issue? Drop me a message and I’ll help you reduce the stress levels.


Much Love

Tabby xxx


#thecalmbride #theweddingfixer #createmyhappy

By modefor, May 14 2019 08:52AM

Dear Brides


Are you finding planning your wedding slightly overwhelming?


Do you feel anxious about fitting in ‘that’ dress?


Do you feel stressed out by family or friends?


Are you fighting battles over who you should invite, be that adults or children?


Are you worried about sticking to budget?


Do you just want to enjoy the whole process but don’t feel that you can?


Are you nervous about being the centre of attention?


Are you concerned that members of your family won’t get along on the day?


Are you starting to dread your own wedding day?


Has the answer to any of the above questions been ‘yes’?


If so, I want to help you and take all that stress away and become calm and stress free.


This week is #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek and your mental wellbeing should be a priority during the planning of your wedding and that’s what I’m here to help you with.


With over two decades planning and producing events and weddings I have helped thousands of clients and what my brides will tell you is how I kept them calm and made the whole planning process and wedding day stress free.


This is my aim and my focus is on your wellbeing as you prepare for one of the most exciting experiences of your life. I’m here to support you as you plan your big day.


Working with you for just one session to get your mindset in a good place or throughout your engagement I will help you to develop the mental resilience to love every moment of your wedding journey. ‘The Calm Bride’ is for you and what you will become.


Working exclusively with you to plan and produce your wedding or working alongside your existing planner and suppliers, my priority is you and my expertise and experience are at your disposal.


Want to know more? Then contact me via our website for more information on becoming #thecalmbride


Much Love

Tabby xxx

#thecalmbride #theweddingfixer #createmyhappy